It Takes Courage
by Chellybean17
Summary: When one of Loki's concubines gets pregnant, neither of them are thrilled. Carmen loathes the Jotun and Loki sees her as below him, but could the new life inside of her awaken feelings they've had all along? She'll have to decide where her loyalties truly lie, for the Avengers plot in Midgard to bring the king down. Possible LokixOC, AU (Loki King of Asgard too, all is explained :)
1. Chapter 1

**First and foremost let me give a HUGE thank you to my fantastic beta reader Scarlett Kingston, without whom very little of this would be possible. Please favorite and follow if you like what you read, and know that I will reply to every review, good or bad, that I receive. Hope you enjoy!**

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Loki Laufeyson, King of Asgard and Midgard, tapped the arm of his golden throne, looking down at the whore that stood before him. She was beautiful, even by his standards, with bronzed, golden skin, raven black hair that fell down her back like a sheet of silk, and a curvy figure that the eyes followed willingly. The expression on her face was the one she usually wore, full of haughty boredom and disdain, her green eyes looking past him. That look always made him conflicted; he either wanted to slap it off her face, or laugh and enjoy her more because she was so different. He did both as he pleased.

"Why was she brought before me, General?" he asked the Chitauri who stood behind her. "I did not send for her." He did not see his concubines unless he ordered them brought to him. It was strange that the guard had taken her; she must have done something wrong. Although, Carmen had been one of the first girls to join his harem, and was one of the only original girls left (the others had become boring and broken, and were sent away when they no longer interested him).

She knew the rules, so what reason would she have to break them after all this time? She was almost as self-preserving as he was, even with all her haughty confidence. The Chitauri shoved Carmen forward, ordering her to speak. She gave him a look of annoyance before speaking, her voice languorous and self-assured.

"I committed no crime, Your Grace, despite what this idiot might say. I'm just…pregnant." The king froze at her words.

He studied her face, her body, attempting to find some sign of deceit that would give her away. He looked to the brutish alien. "General. Leave us now." His voice was smooth and sleek, but each word was laced with a hidden poison that slid from his gilded tongue. As soon as the alien left, he looked at Carmen, a cold fire flickering behind his eyes. "Come here." He had to confirm it himself. Quickly, she stepped up the steps that lead to his throne, and tentatively sat down on his lap.

"I'm not lying, you know. Why would I?" Loki did not deign to respond. Narrowing his eyes, he placed his hand on her stomach. Even before he did the spell, he could feel a soft, curving roundness where her midsection had once been flat, and he felt a sinking in his own stomach. Just to be sure, he reached out with his own mind . . . and gave a sharp intake of breath at what he felt. The energy inside of Carmen was too much for any one Midgardian, or even any one Jotun; there was a babe within her womb, without doubt.

"How are you pregnant?" he asked, looking at her critically. How had she done it? He'd cast spells on all the girls to stop this very thing from happening, so how was this child even possible? He didn't want children, not now, maybe not ever. Yet to smite his own blood, his own progeny, his possible heir . . .

The girl looked at him with what passed as an innocent expression on her face. "I don't know. Maybe you cast your spell wrong." Loki's jaw clenched. She was being forward with him. Carmen looked away from his eyes, the sudden intensity brought from her comment sending a small quiver through her spine.

Loki's tongue rolled and moved about in his mouth as he sought for words. "It is not supposed to exist," he growled. "How did you get past my spell?" It had to be her fault, the insolent little swine.

Carmen shrugged. "I don't know. I didn't do anything, it was your seed."

Loki seized a fistful of her hair, turning her face to look into his. "This child is in your womb, ingrate; the fault is yours. Be careful how you speak to me or I will kill you both."

"You won't," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. She held his gaze as she continued talking. "Because this child is strong. This child broke through all your spells, and is _your _blood. You would be a fool to kill something so powerful, so determined to live, and I know you are not a fool." He let his hand slip from her hair as he sat back in his seat, a silent resentment beginning to well up inside him.

"You're afraid, aren't you," she continued, this time louder and more bold. His eye flicked back to hers, lips thinning. "You're afraid you're going to be just as bad a father as both yours wer-"

He shoved her off his lap. She tumbled down the stairs, landing part way down with a small thud. Angrily, he descended after her. "You little slut. You think to lecture me on how terrible my parents were, but I will put them to shame. They never dared kill their own children, but I will strike you and your brat where you stand and be glad for your absence."

Her eyes were steely as she looked up at him. "You say that, but you don't mean it," she said, determination in her voice. Carmen raised her chin proudly. "I am _not_ afraid of you."

"Oh, you are not afraid of me?" Loki laughed mockingly. "Then why do I hear a tremor in your voice? Why do your eyes skate past mine?" He looked down at her with contempt. "You are nothing but a farce, and a pathetic one at best. I should punish you for your insolence."

At the threat of punishment from Loki, most people quailed and resorted to groveling and begging to avoid his wrath. Carmen did neither. To be sure, she looked shaken, and her confidence was not at its highest, but she refused to back down completely. "If I broke down every time you threatened me, I would never have a moment of sanity in my life."

A miniscule part of him couldn't helped but be impressed by her backbone. The rest of him, however, was filled with cold fury at her continued defiance. He lifted his booted foot to kick her solidly in the abdomen, a smug smile forming on his face when she shrank away. For a single, satisfying second he saw her arrogance disappear to be replaced by delicious worry and fear as she wrapped her arms protectively around her waist.

He crouched in front of her, placing his fingers under her chin and forcing her to look up at him. "You are all just cowards, in the end," he said in his silky voice. "And you are all mine to command." Loki rose, snapping his fingers. "She will be moved to the quarters adjacent to mine," he ordered the Chitauri that rushed forward. "I will not have her foolishness endangering the child."

The Chitauri pulled Carmen roughly to her feet, practically dragging her out of the hall when she failed to move quickly enough. The king turned silently and walked back up to his throne, the smug look still etched on his face. That was what it was all about; breaking those haughty creatures and teaching them who their real master was. Carmen had taken the longest to crack, but the child within her would be her undoing, and a beautiful undoing it would be.

x X x

Carmen groaned and rubbed the side of her head as she left the throne room. That had been...rough. Not only was she tired from her baby (which was Loki's fault, because normal babies just didn't grow like that), but she was mentally worn from keeping up her front of strength. But it wasn't like she had done really well with that either. He'd seemed crueler than usual, so she couldn't wait to see what he'd be like once the baby actually came out. At least her baby felt okay in her womb; she'd been worried it might've gotten hurt when he pushed her down the stairs. And when he'd lifted his foot to kick her...she shuddered just thinking about what could've happened to her and her baby.

Many people scurried past them, but they all gave the Chitauri guard and the king's concubine a wide, respectful berth. She was a slave in all but name, and Loki did hurt her when the mood struck him, but she was his, and no one touched her but him. They stopped at her rooms, which were guarded by two Chitauri (the king didn't trust any men with his harem). Carmen barely spared them a glance as she pushed open the gilded door and walked inside.

The door opened right up into the bedroom; whoever had set this place up clearly didn't believe in wasting time. The room was large and regal, but it seemed smaller with all of the beds crammed inside. The king didn't believe in wasting space; they all had to share a bed with another girl, but with all the adding and subtracting of girls that went on, there were no claims made to any particular area. Organization wasn't the name of the game for Loki's harem. Meg was the only one in the room, enjoying the space as she lay sprawled out sleeping. Loki had enjoyed her company last night, so she was left in peace to recover.

"Hi girls," she smiled wearily as she went into what passed as the living room. Scattered about the large, open space were several small couches and chairs of green velvet. Some of the girls played chess on the floor or practiced mandolin duets in the corner, while others lounged on the soft couches and merely talked quietly or braided hair. A girl was crying in at least one of the conversations.

"Shut up, I'm trying to concentrate," a girl with platinum blonde curls hissed as she stared intently at her sheet music. That would be Eloise. She was the only one other than Carmen who had been there since the beginning, and she fancied that they were in some sort of competition for Loki's affections. Carmen knew better; the king would never give all his love to just one girl.

"Psh, we'll work on it later." That was Amala, one of Carmen's best friends. The Indian girl gathered up their music and set her instrument in its case, ignoring Eloise's fuming. "So how did it go?"

"Are you okay? You look tired," Haydn murmured, her round freckled face full of worry that made even Carmen's guarded heart ache. Haydn, little Lucille and sweet Zahira were all very young, just in their early teens, and were all virgins. Loki liked to get a few young ones, but they never lasted long. Even though Carmen knew none of the girls would be around after a month or so, she never failed to develop a motherly, protective love for them. At least most of the older girls had experience, but the little ones…it almost made her weep how innocent they were. That innocence would be gone as soon as Loki took them to his bedchambers.

"Is he gonna take the baby?" Timid Jamie with the deep auburn curls whispered, putting aside her book.

Carmen slung her arm around Amala as her friend approached, gratefully taking the support though she tried to make it look casual. The others looked up to her; she couldn't show them how weary she was feeling. "Fine, mostly, I don't think so," she replied, putting more belief than she felt into those words.

Amala pursed her lips at that response. Her dark eyes glimmered with curiosity about what had really happened (Carmen had never been able to fool her, even for the short amount of time they had known each other), but she didn't voice her doubts. "You've got to give us more than that, Car. We're all dying for some good gossip."

Trying to regain some of her usual playfulness, she smiled and said, "Well he was pissed at first, but I don't think he'll hurt the baby, not really. I just have to move into the rooms next to his so he can 'keep an eye on me.' I think he means 'get to me quicker whenever he wants to bang me.'" Knowing, but almost sad laughter followed that.

"He's still keeping the rest of us, right?" Eloise asked, worry creeping into her voice.

Carmen snorted, her disdain genuine. "What do you think? He's too horny to stick with just one person. Although…" she bit her lip, glancing over to Haydn, Lucille, and Zahira, who were so full of light yet so small and scared. "Maybe he'll let them go."

"Do you think?" Zahira asked, hope shining out of her wide brown eyes.

"I could see my mom again," Lucille whispered.

"I'll try," Carmen promised. Neither she nor any of the others had the heart to tell them that their chances were slim, but she'd try her best to get the younger girls freed. As slim as the odds were, maybe Loki would be slightly more willing to listen to her now that she was carrying his child.

Many of the girls looked like they had questions (some more well-meaning than others), but before they could put them to words, Amala left the room and brought Carmen with her. Sighing, they both collapsed on a bed, which was softer than it was large. Carmen felt her body finally relax, and her mind began to as well.

"So Carmen, what really happened?" Amala asked gently, putting her hand on the other girl's shoulder.

Carmen bit her lip, deliberating. She told Amala almost everything, and she trusted her more than any of the girls still there...but she wasn't as true as Leah. Amala had a tendency towards gossip, where Leah had been fiercely loyal and unrelentingly stubborn. It was her stubbornness that had made her break, in the end; she snapped where Carmen would bend. But she was gone now, sent back to who-knew-where down on Midgard, where Carmen would likely never see her again.

"He got mad at me," she admitted. "Angrier than I've seen him before. His anger is...weird. He goes from that scary calm of his to hitting me to laughing because apparently I'm funny." A small smile curved her lips. "But I was the winner. I got to keep my baby and my life." At the risk of her pride and some of her strength, but it was a small price to pay.

"For now, anyways," replied Amala, raising an eyebrow. "You know how he likes to get his way."

"He shouldn't get his way all the time," she muttered. Easy enough for her to say here alone in their bedroom, but out there, he was king. He'd get what he wanted; she just wouldn't let him get it without a struggle.

"But he does, and that's not changing anytime soon," Amala sighed. "I don't know why you try to be so difficult all the time. He gets mad at me sometimes, but I think it's only fake mad, so he can spank me or tie me up or whatever. You're lucky he hasn't killed you yet."

"Not lucky, careful." Carmen knew where his breaking point was, and while she pushed the boundary sometimes, she'd never crossed the line. She yawned, propping her head up on her hands. "I should probably go now, to my fancy new rooms or whatever. But he never said when I had to be there, so we should play a game of chess first." Little rebellions. Little rebellions kept her strength alive.

The Indian girl shook her head adamantly. "No, you've done enough damage already. Those Chitauri could hurt you if you made them wait too long, and I don't even want to think about what _he_ would do."

"Nothing he won't do already," she grumbled, reluctantly pulling herself up to a sitting position. She raised her arms over her head in a languid stretch as she stood. "Fine, I'll go. But only because I love you, and because you're going to help me change this baby's diapers. I better say bye to everyone." Carmen stuck her head into the sitting room and waved. "I'll see you lovely ladies later."

A chorus of goodbyes rose from the girls, some sincere but some scathing and sarcastic. She wasn't friends with _every_one.

She didn't have any bags to pack, as the girls shared their expansive wardrobe. Loki would find her some new clothes. With a final tight squeeze from Amala and some last minute hugs from Haydn, Lucille and Zahira, Carmen left the harem's room behind and walked outside, hoping she was ready for whatever fate had prepared for her.


	2. Chapter 2

_Carmen looked down at the babe cradled in her arms, and felt a swell of happiness as she'd never known before fill her heart. He was perfect and tiny, with a soft fluff of black hair and skin light as brown sugar. She hugged his warmth to her chest and sighed, joy shining from her face. Her beautiful little son was with her, and all was right in the world._

_That was, before _he _appeared._

_Baring his teeth in a cruel, snarling smile, the king emerged from the dark mists like a ghost, his form swirling and insubstantial before he solidified. His skin was cold and blue, his eyes red as fiery rubies as he took on the Jotun form she had only heard of._

_She clutched her precious baby close to her chest and ran as fast as her legs would take her, but it felt like she was pushing through mud. Every limb moved with agonizing slowness. Loki, on the other hand, shot after her with the speed of a striking cobra, quickly gaining on her pathetic attempt at escape. His frosty arms stretched towards her, their cold chill permeating the air. Then, as the chill reached the child she was trying so desperately to shield, the true horror began._

_Her baby's skin, softer than silk and warm as a summer's day, began to match that of his father. Slowly at first, then all at once, until she held a growling demon as cold and unyielding as his father. Still she ran, despite the tears streaming down her face, despite the fact that she was almost as afraid of the thing she was protecting as the thing she was running from._

_Before she knew what had happened, the king's hands were on their son's ankles and the child was wrenched out of her arms._

_"No!" Carmen screamed, spinning around to face the monster. She was not expecting what she saw. The baby was gone, replaced by a grown man almost identical to Loki, right down to the predatory grin._

_So she ran. The twin devils nipped at her heels, their icy breath sending a shudder of goose bumps down her body, but she did not stop for fear of what they would do to her. She ran in the dark until, without warning, her pursuers were gone and she was surrounded by light._

_She did not find it odd that she was suddenly in the middle of Central Park surrounded by lush grass and flowering plants. She did not think to wonder why everything around her flickered and blurred as if the antenna on the TV wasn't quite right. The one thing Carmen did question was a girl in the distance, whose form faded in and out like a candle's flame._

_"Leah?" her voice was hesitant, hopeful. She thought she saw a twinge of a smile on the girl's face, but she was too far away to tell. "Leah, is that you?" She stepped closer, fearful of startling the distant girl who might be her best friend._

_The girl opened her mouth, her lips forming words that couldn't be read. She held out her hand saying, Come to me, I need you._

_She moved nearer, but as the distance between them shortened, the girl's image became increasingly hazy and the words she was trying to speak melded together into a static hum. Carmen caught a glimpse of short chestnut hair and a sad smile on a pert face before the girl blipped out and disappeared. Seconds later, Carmen disappeared too, her body turning to wind._

When she jolted awake, her body was on edge and filled with fear. She hadn't meant to fall asleep. What if he was mad at her, what if he had sent for her but she wasn't awake to hear him, what if…stop. She closed her eyes and leaned back against the pillow, breathing in and out slowly as she told herself to calm down. If he was angry, she would know about it. If he had wanted her, he would've come and gotten her. Everything was okay.

As she went to the bathroom to take care of her morning routine, her mind wandered to the dream she had. Remembering her dreams had always been like grasping at puffs of smoke for her, and all she could recall from the first part was freezing air and desperate terror, but the dream she had just woken up from…that was as clear in her mind as what she saw in front of her. That had been Leah, she was sure of it; the hair was shorter and choppier, yes, but it was Leah's color, and her face was not one Carmen would forget. But why would she dream of her friend now? She didn't have an answer to that, she decided, as she smacked her now-red lips.

She wasn't surprised to find that Loki had given her a well-stocked closet. With a resigned sigh, she slipped into a long, red silk gown. It hardly mattered what she wore, as she would likely be taking it off when night fell. Come to think of it…she didn't even know what time it was. Her room didn't have any windows, and her natural rhythms were so messed up that her body didn't even have a suggestion.

Carmen walked back out to her bedroom, picking up an apple from the tray of breakfast foods a servant had thoughtfully brought her. Her eyebrows shot up when she saw the time on the clock. It was _two_? In whether to be excited or scared.

Her eyes darted around the room, looking for something to do. There was a small bookshelf, but nothing caught her interest, and she wasn't very well going to sit there all day and just think. Loki wouldn't expect her to remain in the room by herself all the time, right? It would be perfectly fine to go hang out with the girls for a few hours. As long as she didn't go anywhere forbidden like the training fields, she'd be fine.

Apple still in hand, she pushed open the door and gave a cautious look down the hall. No guards. Huh. Maybe…she bit her lip, a glimmer of curiosity growing inside of her. This could be her chance, to finally explore the palace and see all the things Loki kept hidden from her. The opportunity was so tantalizing and more within reach that it had ever been – which was when she realized it was a setup. He was testing her, and she wasn't stupid. She wouldn't have gone anyway; she was pretty smart, but she wasn't foolish enough to believe that she could trick the king. He would find out if she went anywhere she wasn't supposed to.

With a soft sigh, she shut the door behind her and headed down the hall to the harem's rooms, which luckily were not too far away. The Chitauri at the door didn't question her, but they seemed to shift as she went inside. A few girls were napping, so she stepped quietly as she went through the bedroom, stopping to toss her apple core – then _oofed_ as she ran into someone much shorter at the door.

"Watch where you're – oh my gosh, _Carmen_?" Eloise's eyes were wide with shock, though she quickly recovered and went back to her usual sharpness. "Did he get bored of you already?"

Carmen didn't respond, sliding past the other girl to sit down on the arm of the couch. Responding to Eloise only encouraged her, and Carmen had never liked starting fights. She laughed as Amala pulled her down onto the couch, kicking her long slim legs in the air. A few moments later she pulled herself up into a sitting position, a smile still lingering on her face. "Nice braids," she complimented, gesturing towards the intricate swirls Amala had arranged in Zahira's dark brown hair.

"Oh yeah," Amala nodded. "And her hair is crazy curly, so it took me twice as long. But…hold on, why are you even here?"

"Oh, thanks," she said dryly. "Glad to know how loved I am."

"Oh shut it, you, you know what I mean. Why'd he even make you move out if you just come right back?"

Carmen sighed and ran her fingers through her silky hair. "Well I'm going back later tonight, but…I don't know. There's not much to do in that room, so I thought I'd come hang out with you ladies."

Eloise laughed, her voice grating and high. Even those who weren't paying attention to their conversation paused what they were doing to look over in annoyance. Not even her friends could stand her girlish cackle. "So he _did_ get bored with you!"

"No, he just has things to do during the day. He is a king, after all." She spoke slowly, as if explaining to a small child. Amala snorted.

The petite blonde sniffed as she sauntered back over to her circle of friends, who were playing cards on the floor. "I know who's going over the Rainbow Bridge," she said in a sing-song voice.

"I know who can stop being such a bitch!" Zahira suddenly piped up in her accented English. Her dark eyes were filled with fire as she glared across the room at Eloise. "All you do is hurt people, and not just Carmen either; you need to stop."

"Zahira, it's fine," Carmen murmured, reaching out to touch her shoulder. While she did appreciate Zahira's attempt stick up for her (and everyone else Eloise was awful to), the younger girl was just no match for the much older and more experienced Eloise. "Don't start anything." Looking imploringly over at Eloise, she added, "Don't get in a fight with a high-schooler; me and you can hate each other as much as you want, but don't bring her into it."

"Okay, _mom_," Eloise sneered, causing her friends to snicker. "Are you going to send me to my room too?"

God, sometimes she just wanted to punch that girl, but she stayed cool. The king was much more scathing and clever than that; it wasn't hard to ignore Eloise compared to him. Zahira hadn't even met Loki yet, so she hadn't had the slightest taste of what real venom was. "Just play your game, El."

"I don't know how you put with her," Zahira fumed, crossing her arms. "I want to rip her face off."

"Yeah, me too," Carmen agreed, a slight smile on her face. "But he doesn't want us to fight, physically, at least. One girl scratched another a few weeks ago, and he tossed her home…after spending some quality time with her."

Amala shuddered. "I remember that. Michelle, wasn't it? He had a guard bring her back around here as a warning before he got rid of her and she was, well, let's just say she barely looked human."

Carmen nodded in agreement. "He doesn't like anyone but him hurting us. Lucille, sweetie, what's wrong?"

The pale, frail girl had started to sob, leaning on Hayden's shoulder. Hayden gave her a tight hug, leaning her head with its fiery curls on Lucille's. "She's scared," the redhead murmured. "She cried all night when you left us."

Carmen's heart ached for both of them. Lucille had been delicate and fragile since she first came to Asgard, and sweet Hayden was the one who always held and comforted her. Looking at them, and at Zahira, whose eyes were hollow at hearing their conversation despite her earlier blaze, she felt a determination gathering inside of her. She would do whatever it took to get them sent safely back home. It might take time, but she would do it.

She patted the couch cushion and the two girls climbed up in between her and Amala. "It's okay to cry," she murmured. "Everyone here does, as I'm sure you've noticed. I cry, Amala cries…there's a lot to cry about. But if that's all you do, you let him win. You don't want to let him win."

"But hasn't he already?" Zahira said dully. She was all fire and boldness with the other girls, but when it came to Loki, she withdrew. She was 16, while Hayden and Lucille were 15 and 13, respectively; she wasn't quite as innocent as the other two were, but she was a far cry from what the older girls were who'd been with Loki.

"No." Carmen reached over and squeezed the Saudi girl's hand. "He only wins when you turn into a girl like Eloise, or when he makes you think there's no hope. As long as you keep your mind sharp, strong, and, most importantly, your own, it doesn't matter if he calls himself a king; you're the queen of yourself."

Amala shifted uncomfortably, giving Carmen a cautionary look. "You know what he'd do to you if he heard you say that."

"We're the only ones who can hear it; everyone else is busy. You're not going to tell on me, are you?"

"No, but…you shouldn't talk like that. Especially around them, they'll pick up on it." Speaking more towards the younger girls, Amala added, "As much as you should try to stay your own person, you have to be flexible. Don't forget that, or he'll snap you like a twig."

Carmen pursed her lips, not quite agreeing with her friend. "You can bend for him, if that's what it takes to stay alive – I know I let him get his way even when I'd rather not to save my own skin – but you can't let him mold you. You have to be more like one of those flexible rulers and less like a ball of play dough."

"Wow, you're really reassuring me," Hayden smiled wryly. "I'm kind of hoping he forgets I exist."

"I just wish he hadn't picked me," Lucille sniffed, finally finished sobbing. "I wish I could go back home."

The girls nodded sadly, and let out a collective sigh. That was something that they could all agree upon, but that none of them had an answer to. Amala, who'd never been able to stand silences, suggested brightly, "Why don't we play blackjack? Hey, Jaime, toss me the cards. Thanks."

They passed the rest of the day in the usual way. After several rounds of blackjack (Zahira came out on top, but Carmen and Hayden weren't far behind), they lazily switched in and out of the handful of activities they could do. Amala taught them how to do the braid in Zahira's hair, Lucille in a rare moment captured the whole room's attention with an angelic reproduction of a popular Midgardian song, Hayden and Carmen participated in a chess duel while the others gossiped, Zahira showed off some sultry Saudi Arabian dance moves, and they all tried their best to come up with a name for Carmen's baby.

"I still say Agrajeeta if it's a boy," Zahira argued. "It was my cousin's name; it means first champion."

Hayden laughed and tossed a pillow at her face. "Her baby's not Saudi like you are! Try to think of some normal names!"

"What, like Fandral or Volstagg?" Carmen grinned. "Honestly, I doubt my input will matter much." She couldn't see Loki taking her suggestions on what to name his child. Thinking about him reminded her that she had somewhere to be. "Crap. Does anyone know what time it is?"

"Seven," Amala quickly responded. "Oh! Carmen, you need to go."

"Yeah," she sighed, not overly thrilled to be leaving her friends again. She gave each of them a warm hug before rising and heading out. "I'll be back; try not to have too much fun without me."

She darted back to her rooms, relaxing when she saw they were empty. A small part of her had been worried that the king would be there, but she should've known better; he usually waited until later. As she headed towards her closet, she didn't notice the dark shadow behind her door - but her head snapped back around when she heard the door close with a soft click. Eyes sharp, she glanced around her room, nerves creeping up on her. A few moments of looking revealed nothing out of the ordinary, so she uneasily went about her business. She stepped out of her gown and put it aside for the servants to take care of, then slipped into a sheer gold nightgown. The material made her feel as if her skin was going to slip out of it any moment, the airiness and softness of it flowing gently down her curves.

Without warning she felt frigid hands, harder than any glacier, grasped her hips, and she couldn't help but flinch, breathing in sharply. Her nightgown might as well have been gossamer for all the good it did against his arctic chill. His voice was frosty as he leaned down and whispered into her ear. "So you thought that you could deceive me."

Blinking the surprise and fear that remained off of her face, she slowly turned her head to see Loki standing behind, a cold, unreadable expression on his pale face. "I didn't try to trick you, your Grace," she said cautiously. He was in one of his dangerous moods, she could tell, where he shifted between more emotions than she could name and, worst of all, kept it all veiled so she didn't know what to expect.

"Are you foolish enough to believe that you could leave this room without my knowledge?" Even after all this time, the smooth venom in his voice made her want to shudder, but she wouldn't give him that pleasure.

"You never told me I had to stay here," she said with determination, and her eyes even dared to have a little cheek in them as they flickered up towards his. "And…I could have gone somewhere forbidden, but I didn't. That should count for something."

"Where you went was forbidden as well," he glared, flipping her around so they were facing one another. "Are you too stupid to know that when I give you a command, it is in your best interests to follow?"

"You never gave me a command." She expected the stinging slap that followed as soon as the words left her mouth, but she knew better than to duck and avoid it. That would only make him angrier.

With an amazing delicacy, he ghosted the tip of his finger around the side of her face. "You speak with more boldness than befits your station, my dear." That time, Carmen did shudder. "My dear" sounded like a dark threat when it came from his lips.

She knew what he wanted. He wanted to subjugate her, to punish her for her insolence at disobeying an order he hadn't even given. She would give it to him, then; it wouldn't mean as much if she handed it over without truly meaning it. It was a far better alternative than him forcing her into actually believing that she deserved the pain and humiliation he was about to give her. "Then you had better remind me what my station is." The words tasted sour on her lips, even as she said them in the playfully seductive tone that men loved.

"Oh I intend to," the king said in a low voice, tracing his finger down the center of her body and stopping on the swell where her child grew. "And you will remember your place in the future…or you will see what I do to those who disappoint me."


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for waiting those three weeks for me to update-hope you enjoy! Please continue with all the reviews, follows and favorites, I can't express how much your support means to me!**

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She didn't know how they found her, but they did. One second she'd been suddenly sent to a place that had once been her home but now loomed strange and intimidating, the next she was laying on a cot in a musty, dark bunker. When she woke, she wished she hadn't. The memories came rushing down on her like a rainstorm; pain both mental and physical, despair and desperation and loneliness, and most of all…_him._ His hard unyielding voice, the coldness in his eyes, his harsh hurting hands – rocking back and forth, she covered her mouth with her hands and pressed her eyes shut, trying to fight it. Trying to fight him, still.

She had to block him out, the man whose name she'd never uttered and now wouldn't even think. He was still getting to her, even now, and that killed her. _He_ was the one causing this panic, this fear, making her shake and tremble like a child. But the memories kept replaying on an endless loop that she couldn't break free from, and they filled her heart with anguish.

A soft knock sounded at the door to her small, plain room, mercifully jolting her out of her mind. Swallowing, she tried to calm down and did something she was a master at: put on a face of calm. "Come in," her voice was scratchy and raw despite her best efforts.

The metal door opened and a man came in, but he was the opposite of the man from her memories in every way possible. This man had calm, caring eyes, and his voice was kind. "How are you doing, ma'am?"

"Fine." She made an attempt at a smile, but it shook and collapsed.

He looked at her with a surprising amount of understanding. "You don't have to fake it," he said gently.

Silence echoed after his comment. She bit her lip, not knowing how to or wanting to respond, and twisted her fingers in her long chestnut hair. She didn't trust herself to speak.

He cleared his throat, and her eyes darted up to his with a nervous flicker. Throat-clearing usually meant impatience, and impatience never ended well for her. But his eyes…they weren't impatient. His whole face was filled with a sweet awkwardness. "If you could just come with me, ma'am…it's Leah, right?"

She rose unsteadily and nodded. "Yeah. I'm Leah." Uncoiling and re-coiling her hair, she gathered the nerve to ask him, hesitantly, "Um, what's your name?"

"I'm Steve," he offered with a warm smile. "It's nice to meet you."

Leah blinked in confusion, not quite knowing how to react to the first bit of kindness that she'd been shown in longer than she could remember. A tiny bit of hope sparked within her. Maybe there were still decent people out there, and maybe Steve was one of them. But then she remembered the man who'd held her captive, and she pushed away her hope with a shudder. That man had acted kind, too, every now and then, but that didn't stop him from hurting her far more often. Her heart began to pound at the memories, and she felt a sheen of sweat form on her face as her breathing became heavier and heavier.

_Icy fingers scored bloody lines into her skin._

_Her arm snapped in two with a horrendous crack._

_He ripped her insides apart, over and over and over._

She wrapped her arms around her sides as if to hold herself together, but it didn't stop her mind from succumbing to the pure terror that crashed in like a tidal wave. She felt like she was going to be sick.

"Whoa, sh, it's okay, you're safe here," Steve said gently, stepping closer but taking care not to touch her. "Why don't you come with me, there's someone here who can help you."

Leah gave a shuddering exhale, holding herself tighter. She didn't know that anyone could help her. "Why…why should I trust you?" she asked raggedly, swallowing.

"You don't have to, yet," he murmured. "But I hope you will. No one here wants to hurt you, and no one here will ever lie to you. Do you think you could give us a chance?"

"You won't lie to me? You promise?" she asked cautiously as her heart began to slow.

"I won't ever lie to you, Leah, and that's a promise," he said firmly, with an undeniable ring of truth in his voice.

She could either hide herself away in here with nothing but her nightmares to keep her company, or she could take the slightest of risks and go with him. There was an honesty about him that made her want to trust him, and even still, if he wanted to hurt her, he'd do it regardless of whether or not she went with him. "Okay," Leah whispered. "I'll come with you. But can you, um, answer some questions for me? While we go?"

Steve nodded. "Of course. Some things may have to wait, though."

"That's okay."

"Alright then, if you could just follow me then, ma'am, Doctor Carolyn's office isn't too far from here."

Obediently, she walked with him down the hall, though her mind was buzzing with nervousness. So much she wanted to ask, so little she knew.

"Steve?"

"Yes, Leah?" He looked down at her with that warm, kind smile of his.

"Where am I?" It seemed like some sort of military base, but she had no idea why anyone related to the military would be interested in her.

"I'm not quite allowed to say yet," he winced. "But we will tell you, I'll make sure of it. Just know you're with friends who don't like the man who hurt you any more than you do."

That sounded good to her, and she believed Steve when he said he'd tell her later. She didn't want to trust this stranger, but it was so hard not to. "Am I going to see someone to put me on drugs?" she asked in regards to the 'Doctor Carolyn' he'd mentioned. If drugs would stop her from remembering and being scared, she'd gladly take them, but she'd heard about drugs messing with your mind, and she didn't think she had much mind left to mess with.

"Oh, no," he said, shaking his head. "Carolyn just wants to talk with you. She's a very nice woman, the best there is. And here we – " they paused in front of a door, Steve frowning at the man who leaned on the wall next to it. He put himself between Leah and the other man almost protectively, which she was glad for; the unknown man, with his dark hair and self-assured posture, reminded her even at first glance far too much of _him_.

"Steve," the man greeted with a languid smile. "Stopping by to see the doc?"

His mouth was a tense line, but he softened when he murmured to Leah, "Would you like to go on in? I'll be right out here whenever you two are finished. I need to have some words with my…friend."

Leah nodded mutely. She reached out for the doorknob, but before she could enter the room, the man touched her shoulder and turned her around so she was facing him. With a whimper, she shrank back, her indigo eyes wide. She didn't want to be touched, especially by someone she didn't know.

"_Tony_," Steve said almost forebodingly, crossing his arms and stepping between them.

Tony held out his arms in an obviously faked gesture of innocence. "What?! I just wanted to see what all of the fuss is about. She's not bad at all, I see why Loki – "

Another whimper escaped her lips and her hands flew to her ears. His name was the worst; none of the girls had ever dared to say it, and all it did now was remind her of a slew of terrible things. "Not the name," she whispered, shaking her head. "Please please _please_, not the name."

"Oh, is she – "

"Tony, please hold your tongue right now if that is at all possible," Steve said, his eyes dangerous. He turned and spoke to Leah gently, like she was an injured doe. "Leah, I'll have a talk with Tony, and he won't touch you without your permission or say that name ever again. I understand what you're going through, and I know that those two things are uncomfortable for you." He smiled slightly at her fervently agreeing nod, then opened the door for her. "Go on in and see Dr. Carolyn."

"Thank you," she whispered, the words feeling foreign on her lips, as she looked up at him with wide, open eyes.

"There's nothing to thank, ma'am," he murmured, holding her gaze until she turned away to go into the office. For a second, he thought he caught a ghost of a smile on her lips, but both it and she were gone before he could tell for sure.

"Tony," Steve started to scold, but when he turned around, Tony had already started walking away. Frowning, he easily ran up to the other man to reprimand him, but Tony was already talking.

"She's got a nice body, a little on the skinny side, but it's the eyes that do it for me; I haven't seen that color before," he rambled. With a sigh, he added, "It's too bad she's completely insane."

Steve decided to ignore that; the infuriating man was likely trying to provoke him. "You need to use a little common sense, and some decency would do you good too. Where's all that genius I keep hearing about?"

"Busy trying to find a way out of this mess," Tony said sourly.

"The way I heard it, Leah _is_ the way out of this mess. Oh don't look at me like you're offended, Fury didn't explain everything to me."

"But he did tell you something?"

Steve sighed. "Only that Leah was important, and that she was undoubtedly suffering from some form of PTSD – a fact which you might've found helpful. Do you realize what sort of things being touched by a strange man or hearing someone say Loki's name could drudge up for her?"

"I didn't know!" he huffed dramatically. "I can't be blamed for not being in the loop!"

"You can be blamed for being an idiot," Steve muttered, then said in a normal voice, "Fury's going to bring us all up to speed at the meeting. And I do expect you to apologize to her when we're done."

"Yeah, yeah, suit yourself," Tony said with an eye roll as they went into the meeting room, where all of the other Avengers were already gathered.

"You're late," said Director Fury as the two of them took their seats.

"Apologies, sir. Tony…unsettled Leah while I was escorting her to Dr. Carolyn's office," Steve said, shooting a glance at Tony.

Fury closed his eye for a moment and exhaled, clearly calming himself. "And did he compromise her mental state in any permanent way?"

"I…don't think so," Steve replied.

"Good." Fury looked around the table, his single eye boring into each of them to make sure they were paying attention. "We do not need any more incidents like this happening, got it? That girl is the key to us winning our planet back, and she needs to be kept safe."

Tony raised his hand like he was in school again. Fury rolled his eye. "Yes, Tony."

"Um, maybe I'm just being a little too realistic here, but wouldn't it be better to place all our hopes and dreams on someone who isn't a bucket full of crazy?" He looked around the table. "Yes? No? You want us to depend completely on a girl with mental problems?"

"Considering the circumstances, she's in excellent condition," Fury said, shooting Tony down.

Natasha nodded in agreement. "The other girls Loki's sent down have all been complete messes; she was the only one who was even conscious when we found her. We just don't have time to sit around and wait and hope that eventually he'll throw down someone who's completely stable, which I think won't ever happen. We need to use what we have."

"Am I going to hear any more arguments about this girl being here? No? Good." Fury nodded. "Once we find a way to Asgard, she will be able to help us in ways that even Thor can't. She likely knows other girls there, and she without a doubt knows things about Loki that could give us an edge. I will not tolerate _any_ of you doing _any_thing to compromise her."

"Sir, maybe you should be more explicit," Steve said with a glance towards Tony. "Since some of us don't know how to use our heads."

Fury sighed. "Don't touch her unless she tells you to, don't mention anything to do with Loki, if you have to talk to her at all keep it to safe things. Carolyn can give me a more detailed list once she's done, but as far as I'm concerned, keep your contact minimal."

The more Fury spoke, the more uncomfortable Steve became, though he didn't let it show. The Director was acting like Leah was nothing more than a tool, but she wasn't. She was just a sorely broken girl who needed some help.

xXx

"Hi, Leah, it's good to meet you," a blonde woman, who she assumed was Dr. Carolyn, greeted warmly from behind a metal desk. "Please, sit down."

She sat down distractedly, offering a lip twitch that might have been a smile. She couldn't stop thinking about Steve, his sweetness and protectiveness and warm beauty. There was a war raging in her mind, between the hopeful side that wanted nothing more than to lean on Steve and let him shelter her, and the side of caution that warned her not to trust anyone or anything until she knew more. With that, not to mention the flickers of _him_ that danced on the edge of her mind and her still-present confusion over where she was and why going on in her head, it was a small wonder that she afforded little attention to the doctor.

"So, Leah, let's start off with some basics, does that sound good?"

"Mhm."

"How long had you been in Asgard?"

"A couple months, maybe."

"Alright. Did you become friends with anyone?"

"Yeah."

"Where did you spend your time?"

"The palace."

An impatient sigh from Carolyn brought Leah's eyes flickering back over from the space they'd been staring off into. She'd learned to pick up on things like that, or anything that might mean boredom or impatience. The woman noticed Leah's sudden attention, and jotted something down on her notepad. "Leah, what's bothering you right now?"

Well, she didn't know whether to believe anything anyone said here or if she should trust someone she thought was nice but who could be playing her like a fool, and oh yeah, she couldn't stop thinking about the heartless king who had treated her worse than an animal. "Nothing."

"Leah, do you want to bring down the man who hurt you?" Carolyn asked seriously.

"Yes, but how can I –"

"Then you're going to need to answer my questions." Her voice was a tad gentler.

"How will that help, me answering your questions?" she asked timidly.

"You're important to us, and we want you to feel like yourself again. You're not feeling very much like yourself right now, are you."

Leah shook her head slowly. "No. But I can't be myself anymore; he took it away." She pulled on the ends of her hair and looked away. The panic was creeping into her voice again. "I don't want to talk about it." It hurt too much to even think about what she was before _him_, because she used to be so much better. Now she was a pathetic mess, and she knew it.

"Talking about it will help, Leah, it always does."

"You don't understand," she said, her voice cracking and water seeping into her eyes. "How could you?"

Carolyn gave her a long, measured look. Slowly, she said, "I think I know something that could help. Do you know Steve?"

A trembling nod.

"What about Natasha and Bruce? Or Tony, he might benefit."

"Might benefit from what?" Leah asked, wiping away the unshed tears from her eyes.

"Group therapy."


	4. Chapter 4

Carmen woke up groggily, her body screaming at her the moment she started to shift in the bed. She didn't even have to look to know that there were bruises blossoming on her skin, everywhere from her cheeks and neck down to her calves. The king had been even less pleasant than usual last night; she was surprised that she didn't have any broken bones.

Said king was currently in the process of putting on his tunic, well made and accented in bronze like all of his clothing. She watched him with half-lidded eyes, noting how strong and put-together he looked in comparison to how she felt. That was nothing new; she took all of the pain, and he received all of the pleasure. With a muffled yawn, she hoisted her upper body off the bed so she was sitting up. "I think I'll stay in my room today," she mumbled. Had she ever been this tired before?

"You speak as though you have a choice," he said with an almost-snort. "Fetch me my scepter."

Oh how she hated him. The scepter was only a few feet away from him, but she'd have to walk across the room to get it. It took all of her barely awake mind's determination not to growl at him to F off and let her sleep. She tried not to let her pain show, but it was hard not to wince as she gingerly slung her legs over the bed and rose unsteadily, placing her weight on battered limbs. Her skin already looked like someone had spilled a paint store on it, and she knew she'd be even more colorful (and sore) tomorrow.

As she steadied herself against the bedpost with one arm, the other hand went to her midsection, reassuring herself that her baby was still okay. She exhaled with relief; the bump was still there, thankfully unaffected by last night. Despite everything, Carmen loved that little being inside of her with all of her heart.

Gritting her teeth and holding her head high, she slowly, cautiously made her way across the room. Every step was agony, her legs shuddering and groaning their protest, but she absolutely refused to collapse to the ground like she so wanted to. He'd made her grovel enough last night. "Here," she said shortly, handing him the heavy scepter. "Can I go back to my room now?" If she had to stay standing any longer she just might fall over.

"You can go there, and you can stay there until I send for you. I need not tell you that any variation from these orders will displease me." He left the threat of what displeasing him would mean hanging unspoken in the air. Nothing needed to be said, though; she knew very well what he could, and would, do to her, and was too tired to put up any resistance other than keeping her feelings walled off inside of her.

"I won't leave," Carmen said as she walked out of the room with as much poise as was possible. Normally being cooped up all alone in one small room would've been infuriating, but now? It was sweet relief. All she wanted to do was sleep, so that was what she did, crawling under the covers and curling up into a ball.

When she woke up for the second time that day, hours later, she felt marginally better, but her body still ached and she felt a weariness that was bone-deep. Sighing, she forced herself out of bed and into the shower; she felt disgusting, and maybe the hot water would help wake her up. Feeling a little more refreshed than before, she wrapped herself in a towel, not bothering to take any other measures towards her appearance. The odds that Loki would come for her again were low.

By the time she was finished showering, a tray of food had been brought to her room; she ate it all with relish, since it was the first meal she'd had all day. Carmen grabbed the first book she saw on the shelf and cozied up on the bed to read it. She grumbled when she saw that it was yet another ballad about a brave warrior bashing in the skulls of thousands; how she missed Midgardian literature. But it would have to do, as her body would likely go on strike if she tried to get up again.

xXx

Loki Laufeyson was about to strangle someone. As much as he loved the cold hard facts of numbers and math, he loved them a lot less when they were not working in his favor. No equation or multiplication could change the fact that both the Asgardian and Midgardian treasuries were horrendously lacking in the funds he needed to make his rule more secure. While having people be terrified of him personally was without a doubt to be desired, no peasant would fear the king himself coming to punish them; he needed soldiers for that, and while his Chitauri did their jobs excellently, they had to be fed and housed and armored like any other army, and there simply weren't enough of them for two entire realms. Even doing the obvious and raising taxes in both realms it would take far too long to raise the necessary funds, which left him in a delicate juggling game with all the other areas of expenditure of the royal government. All in all, the king was stressed, and needed to let it out on someone.

"Fetch Carmen," he ordered one of the guards, who bowed and did as told, as he entered his quarters. The whore would undoubtedly be fatigued from last night, and perhaps not as lively, but she had always been more skilled than the others, and, more importantly, she would be deliciously weak and breakable. Nothing relieved stress like twisting another being to his will.

The guard returned moments later and said with a bow, "She said to give her a few minutes so that she might get ready for you, your grace. Would you like me to bring her to you regardless?"

"No. I will see to her. You are dismissed." As if an infuriating day poring over account books wasn't enough, now his toy had to be just as maddening. Her only duty was to please him; she should be ready at every second of the day. It seemed his lessons of the night previous hadn't fully settled in.

Loki walked coldly into her room, his eyes narrowing when he saw her doubled over by her bed, one arm leaning against the post and the other wrapped around her abdomen. The girl turned around when she heard him enter, her face pale and shining with sweat. "I don't think you're banging me tonight," she said through gritted teeth, her defiance making his fury grow.

"And what makes you think that?" he asked as he strode over to her, his smooth voice poisonous. Oh, she would pay for this moment of thinking she could command him, but a small part of him was curious as to what had given her this confidence.

"Because I think I'm about to –" without warning, she covered her mouth with her hand and dashed to the bathroom with a surprising amount of speed for someone in her condition. Now she thought to flee from his presence as well? Unacceptable.

Venom growing inside of him, he followed her sharply into the bathroom, standing by the toilet where she knelt to give her a verbal beating – but he paused when she began to retch, for once in his life caught off guard. While she certainly deserved to be disciplined for her impudence, he decided that could wait until later, when she was not spewing food and digestive fluid; he had never been fond of illness, which made his stomach churn in ways no battle wound ever could. "I cannot lie with someone as disease-ridden as you," he scoffed as he backed out of the bathroom. More darkly, he said, "You will face your punishment though, do not doubt that." He turned on his heel to leave.

"_Loki Laufeyson, get back in here!_"

Her angry yell surprised both of them, not only because the concubine was openly yelling at her king, but because she was shouting his full name when she had never even said his first name out loud before. He turned back to face her slowly, giving her a measured look. The last time anyone had yelled at him was when he was fighting those pathetic Avengers on Midgard.

There was a brief pause as she leaned over the toilet to heave once more, but as soon as she was finished for that moment, Carmen looked at him with absolute fire in her eyes. Her still-damp hair clung to the sides of her face and was flecked in spots with vomit, her faced was washed out and sweaty, and her entire body was covered in the bruises he had made – but she had never before seemed like so close to his equal. "You put this damn baby in me, the least you can do is help me when it makes me sick," she growled.

That she dared yell at him and make demands was impressive but nonetheless infuriating. "You have no right –"

"I have _every_ right, now get your ass down here and heal me!" Her face contorted from a look of righteous anger and annoyance to one of disgust and despair as she threw up again. "My stomach feels like crap, I'm tired, and I don't have time or patience for your BS. Wait. Can you not fix this with your magic?"

"No," he said shortly, almost embarrassed. As skilled as he was in so many disciplines of magic, healing more than the simplest of cuts had always eluded him, something he was loathe to admit. He should leave now and return later, when she would not get sick all over him, to punish her – but leaving now, after acknowledging that no, he could not heal her, would be admitting defeat. A king who couldn't handle a barfing pregnant girl was no king at all.

"Then get me a washcloth or get a healer or something," she said crabbily, interrupting his thoughts. "Don't fret your cold dead heart, tell yourself I need you, just get down here and do _some_thing."

She was so desperate; of _course_ she couldn't survive without him, of _course _she needed him to get by. It was pathetic. Loki stood behind her and placed his hand on her burning hot forehead, murmuring a spell for cooling.

"Thank you," she sighed, closing her eyes in bliss. "I don't know why it took you so long to do that."

"'Thank you'?" he scoffed. "That is what you say? You should be kissing my feet for this."

"If you want puke all over your feet, then fine, I'd be glad – no, don't stop, please; make it cold again."

His lips curved into a satisfied smirk; it was amusing how quickly she could return to submission when she wanted something. That was one thing that could be said for Carmen: she almost always knew when to stop. But this time, she had overreached. "You want it cold?" he asked her in a low voice. "I'll give you cold."

With a small bit of concentration on his part, he lifted the veil of his pale Asgardian skin, allowing the icy blue exterior of a Jotun to creep up his fingertips to his wrists. "Does it frighten you?" he growled, wrapping his frigid hands around her neck. "Does it fill you with fear to see your king as he truly is?" She would crumble at the reminder of what he was.

"No." Her voice was small, but strong. "I was hot, now I'm not; I don't care how it happened." Biting her lip, she added in a softer voice, "You're always the same man no matter what you look like."

Odd. She didn't say what kind of man he was (though he doubted she considered him to be a very good one), but the fact that she had not shied away from his touch, had not quailed at the sight of his ridged blue skin was...unexpected. No one had seen his Jotun form before and reacted the way she did: not at all.


	5. Chapter 5

**The muses and a sugar high smiled on me for this one! And don't worry if you're a fan of Leah/the Avengers- they'll be in the next chapter! Keep up the great reviews, I absolutely love seeing them, and the follows/favorites as well; your support makes this even more worth it.**

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Carmen rested her chin on her hand, looking down at the open book with half-closed eyes. _Go to the library and find a cure for your malady, _Loki had ordered her. She'd wanted to tell him that she wasn't diseased and was probably just suffering from morning sickness, but had held her tongue; she wouldn't turn down a chance to get out of her lonely room, and she figured she'd risked enough last night already.

Now that she thought about it, she'd acted quite stupidly, yelling at the king and even going so far as to order him around. It had felt so nice to finally let loose her anger and frustration, though now she realized how close she could've come to making him let loose all of _his_ anger and frustration. However, she didn't regret it. For that one night she had been his equal – and she wasn't sure if she wanted to stop.

Regardless, she had a job to do; it would help her even more than him if she found something to stop her from throwing up. Unfortunately, Asgardian medical texts were even more boring than the ballads and epics that passed as "pleasure reading." She wasn't having much luck either. With a sigh, she pushed away a heavy tome on fertility and birthing charms (it had gone straight from getting pregnant to giving birth, skipping everything in between), adding it to the stack of useless books.

Resolutely, Carmen picked up the next heavy book – _The Midgardian Pregnancy_ – and flipped to the chapter list in the front. The first couple of chapters didn't interest her, all of them being about a pregnancy with a Midgardian father, but the last one, _On Unions with Other Races_, looked promising. She skipped straight to the section about a Jotun father, feeling hopeful for the first time that day. The way her body would change didn't seem too different than what it would've been if her baby was fully human. To avoid throwing up, it suggested that she avoid strong foods or consuming too much food, which made sense. However, the book warned "procreation between a Jotun and a Midgardian has been oft cited but rarely documented, as the Jotun are not keen to share their ways with Asgardian scholars; therefore it is advised that the reader be aware of the great variety which is possible in the pregnancy. One thing that has not varied in all observed cases is – "

And there the yellowed parchment became blank, the ornate script disappearing off of the page.

Awful realization dawning on her, she turned the next page, and the one after that. The words did not come back until the Afterword.

She knew what this was. There was something in here Loki didn't want her, or any of his concubines, to see, so he'd blanked out the seditious words with a spell. She reread every word she had, trying to figure out what the king was trying to hide, but to no avail. There was something that had happened every time a Jotun got a human girl pregnant, something that was without a doubt unpleasant, but she had no idea what it could be. If something was going to happen to her, to her baby, she needed to know.

Looking around the corner of the library she'd settled in, her eyes lighted upon a scholar. He was copiously taking notes, surrounded by stacks of books, and looked young, awkward, and most importantly, unfamiliar. It was unlikely that he would know her for one of the king's whores, and if he did, well, that was a risk she would have to take. If he didn't, he just might be able to help her.

Rising and taking the book with her, she walked over to his table and tapped his shoulder, offering a shy smile. For men like him, or most men, really, playing the damsel in distress was the surest way to get help. "Excuse me, sir, may I have your assistance?" she said, being sure to use the formal tone that Asgardians favored.

He looked at her with open-mouthed surprise for an instant, before running his fingers through his auburn hair and putting on a rather transparent air of confidence. "Of course, fair maiden. With what can I help you?"

She bit her lip, looking for all the world like someone who was completely helpless and embarrassed, and showed him the book. "There are some pages here that seem to be blank, and I am at a loss on how to restore the text that I know should be there. I was hoping that you might be able to fix this for me. You seemed like a very learned man."

The man preened at her compliment, and nodded, looking down at the book. "I do not see what you speak of, but…yes, there seems to be a blocking spell on these pages specifically, and a very strong one at that, that is preventing you from reading. That is strange, that it affects you but not me."

Was he getting suspicious? She couldn't tell, but she suspected he might be, so she gave him her most winning smile and said, "If you could _please_ remove the spell for me, I would appreciate it _ever_ so much. I wish I could work magic, but it is a gift only the most special few possess."

Her charm erased any of the doubts he might have had in a heartbeat. "I would be happy to do it for you, it is no effort at all, really; it is simply something that takes one skilled in magic to do. Give me one moment…and here you go. Can you read the words now?"

Carmen nodded with delight. The formerly blank page was now filled with words. "I am afraid I must go, but I will see you soon, yes? Thank you so much for your help." She turned away and hurried off to her room before he could say anything. She didn't know Asgard well enough to be confident in her ability to construct a convincing lie, so it was better to flee before he could ask a question she had no answer for.

She curled up on her bed, absently rubbing her belly, and flipped the book back open, reading with lips pursed and brows knit in concentration. "_One thing that has not varied in all observed cases is the death of either the mother or the infant."_ She froze, her heart stopping. No, no, that couldn't be right. She read on rapidly, hoping her eyes had betrayed her. "_Despite great advances in both medicine and magic, to date no mother-infant pair has ever survived; either the mother perishes in childbirth, or the infant emerges stillborn."_

No. That had to be wrong. Whoever wrote the book was stupid, didn't know what he was talking about, got everything absolutely, ridiculously wrong. There was no way…she couldn't think about it, she refused to, she didn't even know if it was the truth.

_Only Loki would know_, she realized bitterly. He's _the only one I could ask who'd be able to tell me if this is truly the fate of my baby and me._ She'd been around the man enough to be able to tell when he was lying, so he wouldn't be able to fool her, either. Until she knew that this was true, she wouldn't let herself think about what it would mean.

A grim determination in her heart, she gathered the large book up in her arms and went out in the hallway towards the king's chambers. "I need to see him," she told the guard shortly. "Tell him…tell him I need his help." As bitter as those words were, she knew acting like she was in charge would get her nowhere with him, and she didn't want to delay finding out the truth any longer than she had to.

The guard came back out, and nodded for her to enter. She stepped inside to see Loki sitting at his desk, writing. She was cautious, but determined. "Your Grace. I need your help. Please."

He made her stand there and wait a few minutes while he finished, her irritation and impatience growing by the second, though she did her best to hide it. His face was blank and without emotion when he rose from his chair and turned to look at her. "What book is it that you are holding?"

"_The Midgardian Pregnancy_."

"If you wish for me to make the words visible, you come on a fool's quest," he scoffed. "Even more so, you come on a treasonous quest; you know that I do not wish you to –"

"I know what it says!" she blurted out, her voice raw with desperation. "Just tell me if it's true. Tell me if I won't live to see my baby grow up."

His pale face darkened as she spoke. "How did you…yes. It is true. You will die, or the brat will die; there is no other way." His words were harsh, each one hitting her harder than a blow from his hand.

"Oh."

And then it all came crashing down on her, and she sank to the floor, her mouth open and her face flat. Her baby, her precious little baby, the one kind-of-good thing that had happened to her since being brought here...and now she couldn't even have that. How she'd wanted to hold that warm body in her arms, not caring who or what his father was but just loving _him_ because he was hers and he was himself, perfect all on his own. How she'd wanted to hear his first words, watch him learn to walk, and hug him close when he got scared. She'd dreamed of one day seeing her son, her baby, all grown up and twice the man his father was, but now it was doomed to be just that: a dream, and only a dream.

"This is your fault!" she screamed, her eyes wet with the tears she wouldn't shed in front of him. "Why didn't you tell me? _Why?_"

Not a drop of pity showed in Loki's eyes, though there was plenty of disgust and even…was that guilt? "You were not meant to know," he said stiffly. "The child would have been stillborn, and that would've been the end of this mess."

"You would let your own child _die_?" Even for him, despite the lack of care he showed for the baby in her belly, that was still hard to believe. "You would let your own child die, just so you could still have me around to bang? That's sick, even for you; I hope you realize that."

She must've been seeing things in her grief and anger, because she could've sworn she saw a glimmer of pain and hurt in his eyes. "I attempt to safeguard your life, and you scorn me for it?" he said, his voice hard. "As little as you are worth, it is still more than a bastard brat."

"That 'bastard brat' is your son! I said it – he's yours too!" Carmen said passionately. "I won't let my baby die, I won't, and you can't let him die either."

"Then you must die."

She immediately saw the problem in that. "You would kill him," she growled. "No sooner would the life leave my body than he would lose his own. There has to be a way; you're supposed to be the greatest sorcerer the realms have ever seen, I know you must know _some_thing."

"There. Is. Nothing," he said through gritted teeth, shaking his head as he glared at her. "Why are you so eager to risk yourself for this child?"

"Love."

"But it hardly exists, and you have never seen it nor heard it," he said, clearly frustrated. "How can you love that which you do not know?"

"I do know him," she said fiercely. "I know that he is mine; mine to love, and mine to protect. I am his mother."

When she said mother, she saw something visibly change in him; she could see the guilt and regret with tinges of sorrow etched on his face, and for a second, for just a single second, she pitied him. He put himself back together rapidly, though not as completely as usual. Each word he spoke was carefully measured. "There…_may_ be a way. But you will have to search for it, on your own, and you will do whatever must be done yourself. You will get no help from me."

She could just about cry with joy. "I will read every single book in that library a thousand times if it gets me my son," she vowed. "No force in this realm could stop me from seeing him."


	6. Chapter 6

**Terribly sorry for the long wait, but hopefully this is worth it! Keep up the reviews, follows and favorites, I truly appreciate every one of them!**

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"How did it go, Leah?" Steve asked as they walked away from Dr. Carolyn's room.

She bit her lip and gave a tiny shrug. "Alright." Yeah, except she'd have to do group therapy with a bunch of strangers and she didn't actually feel any better, but other than that, perfectly alright.

"I'm sure it'll get better; Carolyn knows what she's doing," he said kindly. "Are you hungry? We can go to the cafeteria and get some dinner."

"Um, yes please," she blushed, rubbing her stomach. Maybe she would feel stronger if she got some food in her belly, but then again, hunger wasn't the main reason for her weakness. Her indigo eyes lit up suddenly as a thought struck her. "Oh! You have real food here!"

Steve looked at her curiously, a bemused smile on his lips. "Real food?"

Her blush deepened. "I mean…burgers and fries and pizza; that food. It's not very real, really…but it's like…it's like home." She trailed off to a whisper by the time she was done speaking, twisting her fingers in her hair as she stared down at the ground.

"Hey. You don't have to be embarrassed; when I was England, I would've killed for some good American food. Just don't expect too much, okay?" he smiled. "It _is_ a cafeteria, after all."

"Okay," Leah whispered, her eyes darting up to his. The other man would've mocked her for her sentiment, scoffed at how weak and human she was, but Steve was sympathetic and even tried to relate. "You're really…" she stumbled over the long-unspoken words, part of her not even wanting to say them. "Nice." It came out with a sigh. "Really nice." It felt weird to say, but good. But what if he didn't think _she_ was nice, what if he thought she was being too forward, what if –

"I think you're really nice too," Steve said gently. He opened his mouth, looking like he was about to say more, but before he could, they were approached by a group of people. He stepped in front of her protectively. "Hey guys. We're just headed to the cafeteria to get Leah some dinner."

"We're coming with you," said a sharp female voice.

Leah peeked around Steve's side to see who had come, and saw a redheaded woman, a sturdy man with an intense face and a square jaw, and oh no, not _him_. Not that awful, arrogant man from earlier who made her want to shrivel up into a tiny ball. She ducked back behind Steve; maybe Tony wouldn't notice her.

No such luck. "Hey, Leah, I've been told to apologize, so apology." The shorter man tried to step around Steve, but couldn't get past. "What, is she scared of me, Cap?"

"Yes," he said shortly. "Though she might like you the slightest bit more if you actually did apologize instead of joking around like you always do. Natasha, it might be better if you stayed away for now."

"Fury said to get to know her, so we will," the woman said matter-of-factly.

Steve narrowed his eyes. "Why?"

She shrugged. "Carolyn said something to him and he told us that. It's not up for debate."

He turned around to look at Leah, who frozen behind him. "Is it okay if they come eat with us?" he asked gently. "I'll try to make them behave, but if they don't, I'll tell their boss, and he'll make them stop."

The girl blinked, her eyes flickering around the group. She still didn't like Tony at all, and the man who hadn't spoken yet kind of scared her with his intensity, but at least one of them was a woman. She felt infinitely more comfortable around females, seeing as she'd been with them almost exclusively for the past months. It was clear, too, what Steve wanted her to say, though she was pretty sure if she said no he wouldn't force her to do otherwise. "It's okay I guess," she whispered, rubbing her hand up and down her arm. She wasn't in the business of saying no to people who could hurt her.

"As long as you're fine with it," Steve agreed. He gave the others a warning look. "Don't make any bad choices – I'm looking at you, Tony."

The dark-haired man chuckled as they began to walk down the hallway, Leah still clinging to Steve's shadow. "Me, make bad choices? You must have me confused with some _other_ genius playboy former-billionaire-philanthropist. I won't hold your ridiculously overprotective chivalry against you, Steve, whatever it takes to get in the girl's pants."

Leah flinched at that and stepped further away from Tony. She didn't think Steve wanted to do anything to her, but it was unsettling how much Tony reminded her of him. The more distant she could put between them the better.

"Tony, keep it up and you won't be able to get into anyone's pants," Steve cautioned.

"What, it's _joke_, you people don't know how to have fun," he said, rolling his eyes.

"I haven't had fun in a long time," Leah said softly.

Tony cleared his throat awkwardly, but that was all he had for a response. He turned back and seemed to be looking at her in a new light, his smooth self-confidence absent from his face. Was it bad that she felt good about wiping that smug look off his face with nothing but a hard truth?

Steve looked oddly angry about what she'd said, but she'd drawn a small, impressed smile from Natasha. "Don't hesitate to put him in his place again," she said, eyebrow raised.

"I didn't mean to," she mumbled. The last thing she wanted was for them to think her cruel; _he_ had enjoyed 'putting people in their place', and she didn't want to be similar to him in the least. "I'm not mean…"

"We know that," Steve nodded. He pushed open a door, which led to a room that looked very much like the cafeteria of her high school, just more metallic and professional, and smaller too. "You're in luck, looks like hamburgers today."

Several of the tables had small groups of people already sitting at them, but Steve chose to take a place at an empty one. Leah sat in between Steve and Natasha, with the quiet man right across from her and Tony next to him.

"How is it?" Steve grinned as she took a bite.

"Delicious," she said as the flavors hit her tongue.

"I've had better," Tony shrugged. "You'll have to taste my personal chef's cooking after all this is over."

"Will it all be over?" Leah murmured. She hoped it would, but what did she know? She just wanted to see that awful man gone, and for the world to go back to how it was, as much as it could, at least.

"Sooner or later, yes," the woman affirmed. "He'll make a mistake, and we're always working. We'll be there when he does."

"What do you all, um, do?" she asked with a swallow, making herself talk. These people were trying to be friendly to her, something few people had done in a long time; she had to make herself talk back to them, unfamiliar as it felt for her to do so.

"Mostly boring things," Natasha smiled, and though her smile was good, Leah had practice seeing through them and could tell that it wasn't genuine. "Clint and I do a lot of surveillance outside of the base, and there are plenty of agents to help with that as well."

"I do a lot of surveillance too," Tony nodded. "I've gotten quite good at scoping things out on a much...smaller scale. I'll show you how I do it sometime, if Steve doesn't beat me to it."

Leah bit her lip and looked away, her eyes darkening. His constant little innuendos weren't as bad as they could be, but they still made her uneasy. She didn't know what to say to them, either; she'd just suffer in silence, but what was new there?

"_Tony,_" Nat said, her voice sharp. "We shouldn't even have to tell you to stop anymore; you're acting like a child."

"Children are kinder than he is," Steve said. "Can you not have a normal conversation? Fury won't let you be around her if you keep this up."

"Well what can I ask her?" Tony challenged. "Are you dating? Where do you work? What've you been doing with your life?"

"For starters, you could actually ask her what she's okay to talk about," Steve suggested, his eyebrows raised. "She might have an opinion on that."

Tony turned to her. "Well?"

She swallowed. What _could_ she talk about? Good question. "Um...before. Before is okay. It's sad but, well, maybe there's a chance things could be like that again. Someday. So before is good. I was good, before. I was in school, I majored in political science...I was going to be a lobbyist; my professor said I would be good at it since I was so stubborn…" she trailed off, blushing, as soon as she realized that she talked about herself. No one on Asgard cared to hear about her life, and she didn't expect it to be any different here.

"No, go on," the redhead encouraged with a small smile. "We want to hear about it."

Leah wrapped her chestnut hair around her fingers, still unsure. "What do you want to hear about?" she asked shyly.

"All your wild frat parties and late-night hookups," Tony answered immediately, and before any of them knew what had happened, a fist collided with his face and sent his head whirling.

There was a pause as they all looked around, trying to see who had thrown the punch-with surprise, they saw that it was Steve who had stood and stretched across the table with his arm.

"Tony, I - " Steve swallowed, his face beet red as he slowly sat back down. With an exhale, he composed himself. "I didn't mean to punch you, but that doesn't mean I'm sorry about it. Your rudeness has got to stop."

Leah breathed in sharply, looking at Steve in wonder and admiration. Had he simply been furious and punched Tony because of his anger, she would've shrunk away in fear, but that wasn't Steve; it looked like he'd just lost control for a second. He even apologized. And he'd done that for her; he had done something just for her.

Tony was silent as he touched his cheek, rolling his tongue around in his mouth. At first he looked genuinely shocked that Steve would do something like that, but as the seconds ticked past she could see a fuming anger form on his face. He was trying to hide it, but the other man had been far better at keeping his emotions under wrap, so, for Leah, Tony's face was like an open book. She waited for him to say something, but for once he was silent. If his goal was to make things as awkward as possible, he was succeeding marvelously.

"Leah, do you know how to fight?" Natasha asked suddenly.

She shook her head slowly. "I know you should kick them in the balls...but that's all. He didn't want us to know how to fight him."

"I'll have to give you a few lessons sometime," the woman smiled. "Every woman should know how to defend herself."

"That would be fun." A little scary, but it would be nice to know how to protect herself. A yawn formed unbidden on her lips. "Excuse me. I'm just a little worn out."

"Do you need to go back to your room?" Steve asked immediately, ever the gentleman.

She nodded. "If that's okay."

"Of course it is," he smiled, rising. "I'll take you to it; the compound's pretty confusing at first."

The other three remained at the table as Leah and Steve headed through the halls. When they were out of earshot, she asked him softly, "Does that other guy just not like me, or is he always so quiet?"

"He's just the quiet type, it's not you," he assured her. "I think you would like him, if you got to know him. Clint's a pretty great guy, and he knows a little about what you've been through."

That caught her interest. "What do you mean?"

"When...that man came here, he used magic to make Clint his slave; Clint was forced to do awful things for him, but we got him out of the trance and back into his own mind. He hasn't talked about it much, though."

"No," she murmured, shaking her head. "He wouldn't. Remembering hurts too much." Maybe he would tell her how he kept going; he seemed so strong and put together, if silent. She felt like she was constantly on the edge of falling apart.

They stopped outside of a plain door that looked vaguely familiar, though that might've been because it looked like every other door in the compound. "This one's your room," Steve said. He pointed a little ways down the hall. "The lady's room is over there; it's got showers, and there should be a towel in your closet."

"Thank you," she said in a soft voice, looking up at him with open eyes. "You've been...you've been really nice to me. So...thank you."

"Don't mention it, Leah; you deserve to be treated nicely," he said gently.

"So, um...see you tomorrow?" she whispered, biting her lip.

"Of course. Sleep well."

Then he turned and walked back down the hallway, leaving her with the strangest feeling. It was like there was a place inside of her that was empty when he left; she wanted him to stay with her. She shook her head slightly at that. No, no, she couldn't feel that way; she couldn't be dependent on someone else for her happiness. Other people let her down; at least when she let herself down there was no one else to blame. With a sigh, she went into her plain room, throwing the towel and the soft t-shirt and sweats that were on her bed over her shoulder and walking down to the bathroom.

There was no one else in the bathroom, so she took her time in the shower, trying to wash away her worries. She wasn't fully relaxed, but some of the tension and stress was thankfully gone. The clothes they'd given her were soft and comfy, wrapping around her body like a warm embrace.

Leah stepped out of the bathroom and turned to walk down the hall back to her room, jumping when she saw the man coming in her direction.

"Leah!" Tony called with an easy grin as he walked over to her, completely ignoring the wide-eyed look on her face. "Have a nice shower?"

She gave a small nod, wrapping her arms around her waist. "Yes."

"I bet it was lonely, though," he smirked, raising an eyebrow.

Her cheeks flushed as she took a step back, shaking her head. "No." Her voice was a whisper.

"You sure about that? You know you can always call on me when you're lonely." He took a step closer, much to her dismay.

"Please stop," she whispered, panic-stricken. "You're...you're scaring me." He was getting too close to her, and he wouldn't stop being suggestive, which only made it worse.

He sighed and rolled his eyes, holding his hands up in surrender. "No need to be scared of me, it's not like I'm Loki."

She froze, her eyes turning glassy, then turned on her heel and dashed back to her room leaving a confused Tony standing alone. _Loki Loki Loki_. His name was a pounding drum in her mind, beating away all of the strength she'd so carefully layered up. But she had to stop, she couldn't let herself think about anything that had to do with him, she was safe here - she was safe with Steve. Just thinking about his kind blue eyes and warm face made her racing heartbeat slow. Steve would protect her.

xXx

A dryness in her throat drove her groggily out of her sleep. Licking her lips, she kicked off the blankets and rose with a sigh. She missed the peacefulness of not being awake; all of her worries faded away, her mind free to rest. But her body was determined not to let her slumber, so she headed out the door for the bathroom.

Being nighttime, only one flickering light was left on. She stood in the doorway for a moment, looking out into the blackness, allowing her eyes to adjust. She couldn't tell if it was the nearly overwhelming darkness or her own half-asleep mind, but the hallway looked sinister, much different than it had when she'd first gone to bed. Shadows crawled along the walls in many forms. Putting her hand on the wall to help guide her, she walked slowly down the hall. With each step she thought they would bring her closer to the bathroom, but after a few minutes, she started becoming confused. She should've reached it by now, but her hand hadn't brushed past a doorway yet.

Part of her, scared of getting lost, wanted to just go back to her room, but the persistent thirst in her throat made that impossible. Her eyes flickered to the side, catching a glimpse of...something. Leah turned her head in the direction where she had seen the movement and squinted. Nothing. She shook her head; it was the tiredness, and the darkness. She'd ask someone to leave lights on, or better yet, a flashlight for her tomorrow, and she wouldn't have this problem with seeing things again.

But then it happened again. The (movement) and rustling noise, only this time, her eyes were fast enough to catch the whole shadow. It was a man's silhouette, and it shot a bolt of terror through her heart. She stood stock still waiting for the shadow to either disappear into the others or move. It did neither. She needed to go somewhere else, somewhere with light where she could see and reassure herself that it was all her imagination. Slowly she turned away, her legs quivering and her hands shaking uncontrollably. With her hand against the dark wall, she worked her way back to the light, but when she glanced behind she noticed the shadow was following her. The hairs on the back of her neck began to tingle and grow cold.

She quickened her pace, heading for the nearly-out light at the end of the hall. She then heard footsteps behind her. They were growing louder, _which means nearer_, she thought. She began to panic, her breathing becoming, for the first time since she left her room, audible. She began to run. If it was all in her head, then fine; there was no one there to see her running like an idiot. If it wasn't in her head, then maybe it would save her life.

With a burst of adrenaline pulsing through her veins, Leah ran towards the light, but no matter how hard she ran the light seemed to never grow closer. And she could now hear the breathing of the man behind her. With one final surge of energy, she reached for the light and was suddenly at the wall.

Her hands scrambled across the wall for the lightswitch and by luck managed to flick it as firm hands grabbed her shoulders, flipping her around. She let out a slight shriek.

"Leah. Are you okay?"

Her eyes were squinted, taken aback by the sudden brightness, but she could gratefully see with enough clarity to tell that it was not the man of her nightmares who had hold of her.

"Clint," she exhaled loudly, relieved at seeing a man who was a stranger, but had never hurt her. Still, though, she wasn't thankful enough to want his hands on her. Shrugging out of his grip, she sighed, "It's you."

He raised an eyebrow and asked her slowly, "Are you okay?" She would've felt inclined to say yes, but she didn't. She only nodded. Though Clint sounded concerned, his eyes, his piercing blue eyes, held an empty almost ghost devoid of all feeling in them. And she kept getting chills.

She stepped away from him, out of his eyes, away from his stare.

"Do you want to go back to your room?" he asked flatly.

"Yes, please."

Clint turned to Leah, who was standing with her back to him now, clutching her sides. "Do you know where to go?"

Silence followed. He walked up behind her. Her ribcage seemed to collapse in on itself when she felt his body heat on her back. Her hands gripped her sides tighter.

"Do you know where to go, Leah?" he asked again, this time in a whisper. His breath made her shudder. She swallowed, unable to find words, and so shook her head instead.

"Would you like me to take you b-"

"Yes!" she cried sharply. Either Clint was in a bad mood or Steve had lied to her; Clint didn't seem like that nice of a guy at all. He came around her and gave a small smile.

"This way."

Uneasily, she went with him; she'd get lost if she tried to find her way back by herself, and the last thing she wanted was to be wandering the halls alone again. Her eyes kept darting around as she tried to distract herself. She wouldn't -couldn't- look at Clint. His eyes were so cold. They reminded her too much - too much -

"We're here."

She jumped and mumbled out a 'thank you'. She slid through the door and tried to close it, but Clint's hand held it open.

"Oh, um, Clint..." Leah was at a loss at what to do and he was beginning to make her feel more and more uncomfortable the longer he stayed with her. "I- I'm going to bed, could you-..."

But before she could finish, Clint turned on the light and her mouth fell open. This was _not_ her room. Her breaths became shorter and quicker as she kept looking around. Gray walls, gone. They were-. . . marble. No. Small bed, gone. Other furniture, that was gone too. It was all replaced with ornate gold furniture and green accents. No. _No, no, no_, she thought, _I'm- I can't-. . . I-. . ._ She began to spin around, looking at what was now before her. But that was her mistake. As she turned away from Clint he walked up behind her, his hands latching themselves onto her arms, pinning them at her side, and he brought her body closer to his. She found her voice was lost.

She struggled to free herself from his grasp, but to no avail. A black shadow began to grow, elongating across the room. She held still as she watched it grow. Then he emerged. His wicked green eyes, and cruel smile.

"No. No! No, no, no, no!" she began to cry and sob. "Clint, please," she wailed, "let me go. Please, let go!" She pulled at her arms, trying to free them, but it was useless.

The green eyed man's smile widened, but he still make no noise. He sat on the bed. His smile dwindled down to a smirk and he gave a slight nod. Clint began to move closer to him with Leah.

"Clint, wait. Wait, what are you doing?!" He didn't respond, only moved closer. Leah began to scream for help, but when they had reached the bedside she became silent. The green eyed man stood up, his chest nearly brushing against hers. He reached a hand up to her face and she flinched, but he only brushed the back of his hand across her face. To her though, it felt like a cold fire burning across her skin and a soft whimper left her throat. All that did was bring an awful smile to his lips as he leaned in, his face only a breath away from her ear, and whispered in his smooth serpent's voice, "Did you think you could leave me?"

Of course she had, she'd left him, _she'd left him_. She twisted in Clint's arms, struggling to break free and pleading with him desperately. "_Clint_, stop, he used you too, I know he did, Steve told me, don't let him hurt me again..._Steve!_" She jerked her arms away with all of her strength, but Clint's grasp didn't loosen in the slightest. "_Steve!"_ she cried out, tears starting to slip down her cheeks.

The leering smile on the man's face grew, and he began to chuckle, laughing at her pathetic struggle.

"Steve," she cried one last time, sinking to her knees in defeat.

The floor rose up to meet her, and she landed with a thud. Disbelievingly, Leah looked around. She was in her room, her actual room, on the floor by her bed. Clint wasn't anywhere to be seen, nor was the man whose laughter still echoed in her ears. Her cheeks became even wetter as she began to cry again, though this time her tears were halting and conflicted. She was here, yes...but she wasn't safe like she thought she was. Even here he could get to her, if only in her mind. But in her mind, there was no one to protect her but herself.

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**Next time will (most likely) be a Carmen chapter; how do all feel about Leah? Do you want more of her? Less? Let me know :)**


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